birthdays and such

its been such a long time, blog. but its my birthday today so i thought i'd do a little post, on this rarest of occasions i'll add another rarity of blogging today.

definitely a mix of feelings. you know how some people love to celebrate their birthday, throw a big party, feel all important and centre-of-attention? I usually want to avoid that, and keep out of the crowds and people who want to wish me well. which is odd, i know, but i just can't help it; birthdays make me feel...oddly detached and unhappy. especially mine. i sometimes just wish people would forget its my birthday, not say hello and happy X to me at all, which would make me feel better because then i wouldn't have to force a friendly reply out to them. this time around, i was hoping people would forget entirely. maybe its weird to feel like this but perhaps i just hate the sense of obligation to do certain things on birthdays. getting presents, surprises, acting happy because you don't really have a choice when you're surrounded by friends who deliberately planned something for you...these aren't the sort of things i'm into.

so when i started getting messages from friends in farflung places and lives last night...it was a strange feeling, but strangely nice too. I didn't expect to be happy about it, but i was.

but anyhow, i'm avoiding facebook and all sorts of mass communications til this whole thing blows over. grant me some indulgent escapism on this day.

i'm going out skating with tsg later. this is the sort of happiness that i'm after, i think. not the woohah one-off birthday tirades but the quiet pursuit of everyday joy that comes with being with the people you love.

What the truck.

Current obsession: little cars and trucks from gachapon machine. These are so cute, they're the size of a one dollar coin and come with a little pull-back mechanism even.

At 13 out of 15 designs now, but going into serious redundancy cos I churned 27 already! Just how many more to get all 15 designs?! I just can't help myself when it comes to really nice gacha toys.

There's only 8 designs in this pic though.

Bothersome

The weather is so erratic nowadays. It was cool and breezy, so perfect for sleep in the early afternoon. By the late afternoon it had turned into a humid heatwave, where even a nap wouldn't save you from the irritation of sweat and still air. It makes it hard to study when it's already difficult to start. I realize one of the other post I made was on this very same topic - and nearly exactly one year ago. Mein gott.

I need to stop using my laptop so that I can concentrate on my work.

Maybe tomorrow will be nicer.

blood

It's curious how blood smells like a new metal pipe.

what's more awesome than a gigantic doraemon? A gigantic doraemon WITH WINGS!! :D

I've never seen NTUC sell kites before, but when it did, it's really.... special. Only at Fairprice Xtra, Jurong Point.

Happy Campy

Camping with you. I can't believe we planned to do this within a day and even bought a brand-new tent. Can't believe it, but in a good way.

Just getting to the beach was an adventure in itself. Going for dinner, looking for an AXS machine to print the permit, hunting for apples and barley drinks at shop closing time.

The first time I've spent a night in a tent, and not in the army... I never expected that you would be game for such an adventurous outing, but yet you surprised me. We didn't manage to stay up and talk about deep stuff, like I imagined we might, but I guess in the end you still had a lot of fun just poking me the whole night and refusing to let me sleep. You're so interesting that way - on the one hand not doing some things the way I expect, yet on the other hand being totally surprising. I don't know why I amuse you so much, but maybe that has to do with why I don't know why you amuse me this way either.

And then there were the three bugs trapped in the tent with us, the toilet trips throughout the night, the breeze-less night, among other things. And that we were dressed like we were going shopping, on a camping trip... insane. But I know we'd do it again, you and me.

little green men

Toy soldiers are the awesomest.

mehmeh

I have to so update this place. SO MUCH BACKLOG!