23rd oct 2004
1130pm
Today was national colours award presentation
I thought it was tmrw.
WhAt
Its just so like me to do some dumb thing like this and forget about the date of some important thing, just like I mix up when Ramadhan begins and what mock test I’m having on what day, or even if there’s a test at all.
Ok so now I wont be getting my cert for national colours. Hooray.
I guess that’s punishment enough yup.
On the other hand I can just dish up some believable excuse and hope that lawrence ang actually took my cert back to school with him so that he can pass it back to me.
bleargh even hafta write a explanaton letter to lawrence ang.
Gah. I gotta stop doing stupid things like this.
Saturday, October 23, 2004
study will come
i hope i can get my study will back.
today i went back to school for the first time since baccalaureate, and went back for a three hour human geog test of all things. it reminded about a couple of things: first, my studies are not in order at all, second, i need to practice my writing more, and third i need to buy new pens cos i gave up on writing my last essay after both stupid pens start to sputter. sputter is the best i can term the way the pens wrote; one moment there's ink, the next it leaves out half of a letter of a quarter of a word. so frustrating. looks like i actually have to spend money and go find some quality pens this time instead of relying on pickmeuppens and lousy office bringhomepens...
so today at least i got some work done and finished 11 lects on urban, which is not bad by my standards. i couldve done more, but... i could say 'nvm it'll get better' here... but the truth is that there's really no time left to mess about. i really hafta go and get things done if i'm even going to pass the bare 2As 2AOs... its scary... cos i know i may not pass... and i may get left at my seat on results day.
which would be the second worst.
the worst would be that i have to go to poly and do my tertiary ed all over again... argh!!
how to pass As
1) study.
2) study. like mad.
3) memorize sloman, a&c, othello, hardtimes, geog text,
4) scrape brains off wall after head explodes
5) produce brandon seah clone and call him eugene
6) coerce creffield clone to call herself eugene
7) train with monks on hill and learn the universal answer ommmmmmmmmm
8) put brains back in head. almost forgot.
yup all set to pass As now
today i went back to school for the first time since baccalaureate, and went back for a three hour human geog test of all things. it reminded about a couple of things: first, my studies are not in order at all, second, i need to practice my writing more, and third i need to buy new pens cos i gave up on writing my last essay after both stupid pens start to sputter. sputter is the best i can term the way the pens wrote; one moment there's ink, the next it leaves out half of a letter of a quarter of a word. so frustrating. looks like i actually have to spend money and go find some quality pens this time instead of relying on pickmeuppens and lousy office bringhomepens...
so today at least i got some work done and finished 11 lects on urban, which is not bad by my standards. i couldve done more, but... i could say 'nvm it'll get better' here... but the truth is that there's really no time left to mess about. i really hafta go and get things done if i'm even going to pass the bare 2As 2AOs... its scary... cos i know i may not pass... and i may get left at my seat on results day.
which would be the second worst.
the worst would be that i have to go to poly and do my tertiary ed all over again... argh!!
how to pass As
1) study.
2) study. like mad.
3) memorize sloman, a&c, othello, hardtimes, geog text,
4) scrape brains off wall after head explodes
5) produce brandon seah clone and call him eugene
6) coerce creffield clone to call herself eugene
7) train with monks on hill and learn the universal answer ommmmmmmmmm
8) put brains back in head. almost forgot.
yup all set to pass As now
Tuesday, October 19, 2004
storybook
dint study AT ALL today. read Shadow Of The Hegemony by orson scott card. it is a truly engaging book.
but i dint study and i dont think mr storybook man is gonna help me pass my exams.
this is not good
but i dint study and i dont think mr storybook man is gonna help me pass my exams.
this is not good
Sunday, October 17, 2004
kusuOJT
Today was OJT to kusu
It was kinda boring really.
I felt I dint really fit in first of all.
I know it sounds stupid that I should complain about this, but really, I do feel like I’m not really into the whole scene heart and soul.
I cant bring myself to the kind of fervour over guiding I usually have for stuff that I really enjoy doing.
Mingsheng once said during a workshop that I’m in it ‘more for the scientific part’, which I seem to find more and more aptly descriptive.
Out on the walks I just kinda lose focus and get bored of the leaders talking about some other creature I already know about.
I can feel it in me that I wont be a really good guide in the talking role or seeking role. Gimme the crowd control role then I think that I can handle no problem.
Still, it points towards some general inability of mine to communicate and interact and bond with the layman and public properly, and which I’ve always been aware of.
So I guess something has to be done, that either I change myself and become more chirpy cheery and interactive or else I just slog thru the december walk with a memorized script and get it over with then go incommunicado.
Both ways its pathetic quitely.
Maybe then, I should just learn to open up and not be afraid to talk and initiate conversation.
Then problem solved and I will be happier and people ard me will gain a new friend aka me.
Hahahaha.
Anyways something new seen today.
A DOLPHIN!
It was quite a ways away, maybe 50, 60 metres, but when (the someone) shouted ‘dolphin!’ I turned and saw the beautiful blue-purple back breaking the surface and the dorsal fin cresting out of the water like… like… like something out of imagination tv story etc.
Magical to the point of mundaneity.
Strange but true.
Waiyin would’ve been so excited if she was there.
Yes Singapore waters have dolphins just that its quite rare to see them cos there are so many vessels that most marine mammals are frightened away or, well, mowed over I guess.
I just hope this one returns to the larger sea safely.
A dolphin.
Can u imagine?
It was kinda boring really.
I felt I dint really fit in first of all.
I know it sounds stupid that I should complain about this, but really, I do feel like I’m not really into the whole scene heart and soul.
I cant bring myself to the kind of fervour over guiding I usually have for stuff that I really enjoy doing.
Mingsheng once said during a workshop that I’m in it ‘more for the scientific part’, which I seem to find more and more aptly descriptive.
Out on the walks I just kinda lose focus and get bored of the leaders talking about some other creature I already know about.
I can feel it in me that I wont be a really good guide in the talking role or seeking role. Gimme the crowd control role then I think that I can handle no problem.
Still, it points towards some general inability of mine to communicate and interact and bond with the layman and public properly, and which I’ve always been aware of.
So I guess something has to be done, that either I change myself and become more chirpy cheery and interactive or else I just slog thru the december walk with a memorized script and get it over with then go incommunicado.
Both ways its pathetic quitely.
Maybe then, I should just learn to open up and not be afraid to talk and initiate conversation.
Then problem solved and I will be happier and people ard me will gain a new friend aka me.
Hahahaha.
Anyways something new seen today.
A DOLPHIN!
It was quite a ways away, maybe 50, 60 metres, but when (the someone) shouted ‘dolphin!’ I turned and saw the beautiful blue-purple back breaking the surface and the dorsal fin cresting out of the water like… like… like something out of imagination tv story etc.
Magical to the point of mundaneity.
Strange but true.
Waiyin would’ve been so excited if she was there.
Yes Singapore waters have dolphins just that its quite rare to see them cos there are so many vessels that most marine mammals are frightened away or, well, mowed over I guess.
I just hope this one returns to the larger sea safely.
A dolphin.
Can u imagine?
certain things
i think things are getting better. not much that happened the past few days seem very eventful. spent baccalaureate wondering why i subjected myself to extended chapel and waking up at 5am to rush to school to do... what? watch the ppl i dont like singsong on stage. at least the band was good and i enjoyed the hymns yup. consolation.
picture taking afterwards was awful cos i dont have a proper camera and it was so hot and trying to avoid certain people erk. and then i went home early cos i just felt i couldnt take the 'oh look i love the class let me show it by being chirpy and social' thing anymore. yup.
lately i've been drifting from You Lord.
help me come back. today after failing to find a seat at woodlands library i went for a walk at causeway point and bought four little pass it on cards at mount zion. kinda drifted to that shop and felt quite happy and peaceful for once. hearing christian lyrics over the speakers in the shop was definitely therapeutic. i need you in my life.
anyway. somehow yingshi and i are getting closer, and i'm beginning to harbour mixed feelings about her. she says she and kenny are... i'm also not sure. on off on off on off i cant even remember. can only advise. somehow this is the kind of scenario you only see on tv. anyway deep down she is really genuine and kind and warm, perhaps a bit misdirected and liberal in her affections. i'm not sure about anything anymore, so its best i not speculate. let things run their course la anyway i've got As to handle and if she wants to come down and visit me mugging at the library it's always nice yup.
after exams
go for french lessons with audrey
take up tap (finally) with... joshua? haha mebbe just myself
do stuff with... someone
picture taking afterwards was awful cos i dont have a proper camera and it was so hot and trying to avoid certain people erk. and then i went home early cos i just felt i couldnt take the 'oh look i love the class let me show it by being chirpy and social' thing anymore. yup.
lately i've been drifting from You Lord.
help me come back. today after failing to find a seat at woodlands library i went for a walk at causeway point and bought four little pass it on cards at mount zion. kinda drifted to that shop and felt quite happy and peaceful for once. hearing christian lyrics over the speakers in the shop was definitely therapeutic. i need you in my life.
anyway. somehow yingshi and i are getting closer, and i'm beginning to harbour mixed feelings about her. she says she and kenny are... i'm also not sure. on off on off on off i cant even remember. can only advise. somehow this is the kind of scenario you only see on tv. anyway deep down she is really genuine and kind and warm, perhaps a bit misdirected and liberal in her affections. i'm not sure about anything anymore, so its best i not speculate. let things run their course la anyway i've got As to handle and if she wants to come down and visit me mugging at the library it's always nice yup.
after exams
go for french lessons with audrey
take up tap (finally) with... joshua? haha mebbe just myself
do stuff with... someone
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